<p>Likes to orbit the Sun, but doesn't want to be as cozy with Sun as Earth, and will never snuggle up like Venus or Mercury.  I like my buddies Phobos and Deimos.  But Jupiter!  Geez.  Don't get me started.  Big lug.  No wonder the asteroids broke up.  And Saturn thinks it's <em>so</em> cool because it has rings.  What-ever.</p>

Mars